Playing Catch Up

Whoops. Sent the first one to the wrong address. This was supposed to go out on Thursday.

Thank you to everyone who has written or texted us for information about Lulu. Ever since we arrived in Nanning, we have not had wifi access, so the only way to blog has been to go to the business center in the hotel during their business hours. As you can imagine, it hasn't been easy finding the time with all the official paperwork, meetings, touring and the normal stuff of life. At our next stop there will be wifi in the lobby, so we can write on the computer in the wee hours and then upload it each morning. Until this, here's a recap of this week so far. Also, this is Thom writing, FYI.

Monday, July 26 - GOTCHA DAY!
We arrived in Nanning on Sunday with a bit of a mixup in our rooms after a 5 hour train trip with very hungry boys. Not an ideal start. But we were able to get everything sorted, boys fed and everyone to bed at a reasonable hour so we'd be fresh for the big event.
We are staying at a hotel that many foreigners use, so the staff is used to our particular quirks in eating, etc. At breakfast, we met another adopting parent, who we later discovered was adopting a 9 year old girl who had been at the same school as Minlan (she was in the "big sister" or "jie jie" program, where Minlan was in the "little sister" or "mei mei" program). We were picked up at 3 and taken to a hotel where one floor was dedicated to rooms where families meet their adoptive children, and then on a subsequent visit, families sign official paperwork. In the room with us was a family from Atlanta, GA who have boys 9 and 11 years old. They've been waiting 4 years for their daughter, who is 18 months old. I know, the math is weird, but what that means is that the waiting list is VERY long to get a baby (anyone under 18 months). They matched in April. They were surprised that we had been in the process less than a year, but Minlan's age and medical condition sped the process up. When their daughter came, we could hear her crying down the hall. She wanted nothing to do with Mommy, and bonded with Daddy right away. On a sidenote, yesterday (day 3 of their adoption), the little girl had started to let Mommy hold her.
Then our guide came in and said that Minlan was ready and that she was "a very special girl. Very tender. She isn't crying at all." The big moment came and the boys were ready with cameras and a toy and the biggest smiles ever. What we had learned from reading blogs is that the kids show up at the hotel after the same 5 hour train trip we took, taken away from their surroundings for the first time (for most of them) and not with their foster parents (if they have them). Minlan came in the room and looked around - her vision is low, so she has to scan for a while - and she started to cry and wanted to use the bathroom. She came back from that and Karin took her and cuddled her while she cried and after 15 minutes or so (while all of us hovered and smiled and told her "wo ai ni" - "I love you"), she calmed down. I really credit the boys with helping her by playing and distracting her in that first encounter. Quinlan was especially inclusive in playing with her.
She still only wanted to be with Karin for the ride home, but after a little while, she and I started making faces and silly noises (she was super tired and in a silly mood, so I just went with that). Then we went to a mall to get a gift for her orphanage - two rice cookers and 2 pots for heating water for tea - and while Karin did that, she, the boys and I went "shopping" with Lulu pushing a giant shopping cart all through the store and chasing after the boys. She squealed with delight - a sound I will never forget. That began the beginning of the trust in me and the boys, and by the next morning, she woke up asking where her brothers were. So precious.
Tuesday, July 27 - Paperwork day
We filled out all kinds of paperwork this day which ended with making thumbprints (or footprint, in Lulu's case) in red ink on the official documents. Sorry taht we don't have pictures. We will try to send some when we get wifi on the weekend, and for sure we will have them up on the blog once we return. On the drive home, the boys - who have been really good sports about the food - saw a McDonalds, and we decided that it would be good for a cultural experience to see how McD's is done in China. For the most part, exactly the same. Scary. Plus the kids got kids meals, which included a toy doll of a character we had seen Lulu wear on a shirt in one of her early pictures. By the time we got our food back to the car, Lulu was already asleep. she'd had crummy naps the first two days. But she totally bounced back later. We also had an interesting/great discovery that showed us how much she had bonded already with us. At a restaurant, a toilet attendant (woman in her late 60s?) wanted to hug Lulu and Lulu wanted nothing to do with her and ran to Karin for comfort. In addition, she definitely recognizes taht we speak something ELSE, and she listens very intently to us. She began repeating sounds like "let's go." And she loves technology. She plays with my iphone, touching the buttons and shifting the pictures around. She looked through our photos and she listed who she saw - mama, baba (me), ge ge (either one of her brothers). Then she saw a picture of her foster mommy and she said "mama" but she didn't freak out or start crying. Hopefully, that's a sign that she understands she has a mama from China, and now her forever mama. She's also talking a LOT more today. Asking us all kinds of questions, which Karin understands part of, but to me sounds like "Please Daddy blah blah blah blah?" (Qing Baba, some words I don't know and then Ma, which is Chinese for question mark). She talks to me a LOT, and it breaks my heart that I can't understand her or communicate with her.
Wednesday, July 28 - Touring Day
We visited the Minority People's Museum today. I learned "Please Daddy, I need to go to the toilet" and so I've been able to pick up on those cues from her. She enjoyed looking around the museum, and so did the boys. Too much to go into here, but it was a great view of traiditonal life in China in the southern regions, where still many people live in the ways they used to. We've had a little bit of acting out between Quin and Dec - mostly roughhousing or arguing over whose turn it is to sit next to Lulu, etc. Marilyn has been doing a great job keeping them happy and occupied. Lulu still doesn't respond much to her, but she's doing SO well with adapting to all the other new things in her life, and I know that it will come in time. Toward the end of the day, we noticed that Lulu had a junky sounding cough. Her first crying jag since Gotcha day came when we went swimming. Wearing a swim cap is compulsory, and the poor girl has probably never been to a pool. She doesn't like a bath really - Karin's been bathing her in 2 inches of water - so all those put together were more than she was ready for. And, as it turns out, she was probably in the early stages of getting sick. Because that's where we're at today, Thursday.
Thursday, July 29 SICK DAY
Yep, she's sick. She woke up at 5:20 asking for help with a massive fever. Fortunately Karin had read about this and came prepared for all of it. STethoscope, meds, thermometer, you name it. We got antibiotics in her for her VERY junky sounding cough and childrens tylenol for her fever. Cold compresses. She only wants Karin right now, which is why I'm able to blog. When I left her, she was shivering under the covers, poor sweetie.

And so, that's all folks for now. There's more, but those are the highlights. The boys continue to be loving and supportive. I have given them individual attention, and it's helped them know that they are loved as much as before (if not more). Lulu is a wonderful girl who is sooooo sweet and trusting. It breaks my heart to see her cry, but makes me fall further in love with Karin for what a wonderful mother she is to our new girl.

ADDENDUM: Lulu's cold has broken, and we celebrated by taking her to the doctor for vaccinations. Boooooooo. But she's a trooper, and now we are going to take it easy. We are in Guangzhou and on the final leg of the trip.

Pictures soon!

Take care - Thom



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