Wish Come True

Last night, Thom asked me what I wanted most for my birthday.  I smiled cheerily and said, "Our daughter."  I really meant it but I didn't want to get my hopes up.  Last week no families on Rumor Queen got an April LOA.  That was after 12 families received their Letters of Approval (the final official approval of a family's commitment to adopt their particular child) the week prior.  Last week on Rumor Queen everyone was fessing up to their addiction to LOA statistics.  "Hi, I'm Karin, and I'm addicted to LOA results."  Something like that.  Believe me, I was watching as closely as everyone else and trying to be patient and wait for the average of an 80 day wait.

This morning, I awoke to my 41st birthday celebration before I headed off to work.  The boys got me fantastic DVDs.  Thom got me pretty sparkly things that I love.  The kisses from all were plentiful.  I was happy and on my way to work where folks were sweet and thoughtful and wonderful.  I finished up the morning, went to my jacket pocket, and took a tiny peek at my iPhone...just in case.  It is Monday after all and if you have been reading my updates you know that Monday and Tuesday are traditionally big days for receipt of LOAs.

This was the text I got from Thom:  "We got our LOA!!!!  Happy Birthday Honey!!!!"  I cried, giggled, screamed and jumped up and down all at the same time.  It's day 67 AND MY BIRTHDAY!  I could hardly believe it. 

Now what?  More paperwork and Fedex shipping.  Shots.  Visas.  Packing.  Frantic feathering the nest mode.  A travel date somewhere in June.  A family who is 6-8 weeks to getting on a plane.  The dream of receiving our daughter and getting to know her being only a few months away.  One delighted birthday Mama along with an ecstatic household.  Can I get a "WOOO HOOOOOOOO?!"

Getting Ready to be a family of Five

For a while now, I have been delaying preparing for Lulu's arrival.  Many months ago, I thoroughly enjoyed the nesting process and I discovered all the adorable things out there for girls.  Over the past few months, I chose not to attend to "things" as I realized that we have a good start and that hopeful place in my heart was becoming more and more sensitive as it became harder and harder to wait.  It was time to focus attentively on our family of four and just let us become five when the time was right.

We took a lovely Spring Break in San Diego and spent time at the beach and the various parks around the area.  It was fantastic.  I noticed Asian daughters everywhere I looked.  Most with Asian parents and many with caucasian parents.  I found myself absolutely looking forward to someday taking our daughter to see the Koalas and Pandas and Giant Anteaters at the wonderful San Diego Zoo. 

The first step in realizing that I am ready to finalize the nest was when I saw a booth at Legoland where wonderful artists paint names with shapes from nature or from stories.  Both boys have had, since early childhood, their names drawn with flowers or animals in that Chinese painting style and hung above their beds.  Right away, I knew it was time to get Allura's.   We had her name done in princesses/fairies with various hair colors and flowers.  I just love it!  We also had a smaller one with a hula girl as the "L" in Lulu. 

I understand and can only imagine how complex the naming issue is going to be for our little girl.  We will find out, when we receive her, what she prefers to be called and we will call her that.  But we do hope to work in or at least establish an appreciation for the name and nickname her parents gave her in love and appreciation.

Someone in a blog has mentioned two books to read about adoption.  One is a fictional fantasy book and one about names.  I will attach the Amazon info here but I have not read them nor read their reviews at this point.

Next, I need to work on how to have a 5th seat at the breakfast table look natural and not just added on.  I think it will go from a table for 4 to a table for 5 by simply expanding the one we have.  Or we'll go to Ikea and get a round table.  We always wanted to do that anyway so people can stop being afraid of our creaky kitchen chairs collapsing underneath them.  Hasn't happened yet but it does sound like the ice cracking on a frozen lake or glacier when a person sits down or even shifts their weight...  Ahhh, another item on my list for preparation for Lulu's arrival.  I love this list that I am building in my head because it means that I truly believe that the day will come that we are a family of five.

Allura - Sista to the bruthas

These photos of Lulu came in November after the late October pre-approval from China.  We were floored to get an update just after she turned three.  The boys' photos are from earlier in the school year, ages 6 and 9.

We have recently discovered, through my adoption penpal/blogpal Stephanie (Thank you!) that LOAs usually come in to agencies on Mondays.  That makes sense with what I saw on Rumor Queen/Chinaadopttalk when 12 families from various agencies received their LOAs.  So, we have our fingers crossed, are praying and trying not to obsess- What, me obsess?!  Nah!  No really, I am trying to be patient for Monday and Tuesday of next week.  Today is day 56 for us from LID to LOA and counting.  Hoping to count only to Monday....

Our dossier specialist Marilyn says that LOAs do usually come in on Mondays.  It takes 4 weeks typically to get from LOA and all a few more documents to receiving TA (travel approval) from China.  Apparently TA comes in on Mondays too as a group of families got the TA at our agency this past Monday and are getting on planes to China this Friday!  Amazing!  Usually it takes 2 weeks from TA to getting on a plane.  So, are we 6.5 weeks away from traveling?  Not if it really takes 75-120 or more days to get to LOA.  But everytime I look at Lulu's photos I fall deeper and deeper in love with our little cherub.  I can't wait to cuddle her, sit with her, play with her, teach her, listen to her, sneak in and see her sleeping under her Hello Kitty (of course) comforter, console her, argue/debate with her, watch her play with her brothers while she tells them what to do....

As soon as we get LOA and new photos we will certainly share.  Enjoy these for now:

Sharing our photos.

Creating a blog for adopting families is a wonderful way to share the process.  It's also quite therapeutic and informative to boot.  Through reading the blogs of many families, I recognize that everyone shares the photo of their child.  We don't have to give every single detail and identifier and in that way we can protect her privacy.  But seeing the photos of all of the children who will soon have families of their very own and who are already loved from across the planet fills my heart with hope and joy.

While we await our LOA and updated photos.  Please enjoy pictures of our darling girl.  Her baby photo was at 4 months of age.  Her "fancy hair" photo was age 2 1/2 years. The age 3 photos will be in a posting at another date as they are stored on another computer.

Embracing My Inner 10 year-old

Written 1/18/10:
For years now, I think I have been suppressing my girlishness.  When I was a little girl, and a big girl, I loved Little Twin Stars, My Melody and Hello Kitty.  I enjoyed color, music and language.  I adored anything Japanese or Chinese.  Some of the most hysterical girl-pop was from Japan.  This all faded over time for me.  Perhaps I thought that doctors had to be somewhat serious.  Perhaps it was because there is little cute stuff for boys.   It's hard to perceive Bionicles and Transformers as adorable. 

Okay, now that I think about it, my boys are certainly not hampering my girly side.  They even made stuffed animals with me two weeks ago.  They picked out the characters they wanted to make from Aranzi Aronzo's awesome book Cute Dolls.  Then, we went to the fabric store together, picked out the own fabrics, and came home and made a fluffy monkey and a bird-like creature called Liar.

I have had a great time picking out cute things for Lulu.  Turns out I still love Barbie.  Not the standard versions of course but rather Mulan, Miss Sumatra, the 1998 Christmas version, Snow White, the Tinkerbell Fairies.  Yes, I happen to have some such items in the linen closet waiting for our little girl.  Online I found some GroovyGirlz (or however it's spelled).  I also found the perfect Hello Kitty Butterfly comforter, a matching pillow, and some really sparkly shoes.  Then of course there are the cheerful My Little Pony dolls that my friend Elane's girls passed on to Lulu.  Don't even get me started on the cute clothes.  I decided that it is likely just best to get a few things that I adore.

4/06/10-
Now I find that I have done the bits of nesting I can do.  I am ready to do the receiving.  No, I don't have her bed in the kid's room yet.  I don't have her wall decorated.  I think I am waiting for the LOA to come and then I will be excited to actively work on creating her own space in her home.  The time to prepare that aspect is almost here but if I do it too early, I am afraid that I will just miss her more.  When we get the LOA though and send back our final agreement to adopt our dear daughter, there will be no holding me back.  That awesome name painting that we just had painted for her and spells out Allura in princesses, flowers, and glitter will get framed and up on her wall just like the boys have always had for their walls.   Minus the princesses, flowers and glitter for them of course....

Time and time again...

We are excitedly awaiting our LOA.  This is the document that China sends to formally and finally match a child to their family and to allow us to finalize our commitment to adopting Lulu.

Through participating in three Yahoo Groups, one for our agency (Wasatch), one for our city  and one for the province, I have learned a great deal over the past month.  One of the neat tidbits is that there is a website called chinaadopttalk.com in which people at various stages in the process from all over the country talk about their experience or ask questions.  Three of us from our agency have been communicating closely about how many days between LID and LOA (we are on day 54 today) and who has received their LOA.  Well, an amazing person on Chinaadopttalk actually builds a chart with all the waiting families in the Special Needs program, the age and gender of the child, and the province.  The most important thing that we are all watching for is who gets their LOA and when as it can mean that another family is close to that goal.

So over yesterday and today, 12 families got their LOAs!  12!  Two were from my Wasatch group and they had waited 54 days.  They are however from a different Province but there were two families who had LIDs in February from our province and got their LOAs this week.

We are the next Special Needs family on the list with a child in our province.  I can only hope the LOA comes soon!  Does it come by Fedex, do they call us?  I have no idea.  I'll have to ask.  I am just so happy for the four families in my Wasatch group that have received there LOAs and we hope we are next.  I was hoping for under 75 days, as were the other families and they received them at day 54.  However, the family still waiting the longest on the list is at 85 days.  So, we'll just keep hoping and praying and look forward to the news.